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“Abuse has no place in sport or society and sexual misconduct and abuse of minors is intolerable in any situation. Additionally, bullying, harassing or blaming survivors is unacceptable behavior and will not be tolerated. We must stand with and support survivors, with all of our resources.”

William J. Moroney, Chief Executive Officer, USEF – Full Link

 

Anyone who knows me or has followed this blog for any length of time knows that, while I love having political or critical discussions of society on a one-on-one basis, I typically do not post my opinions about hot topics on the internet. This is partially due to the fact that scientific evidence proves that reading things on the internet will almost never change your stance on them. It is also due to the fact that, honestly, I would probably be burnt out pretty quickly in trying to defend all my arguments and thoughts and feelings.

That being said…

I would like to make my stance on SafeSport very clear:
I support it.

I support the idea that the adults that are put in a position of power over both minors and adults should be held to a standard. I believe that anyone who abuses the position of power should be held responsible for their actions.

I believe that protecting victims from abuse is MORE IMPORTANT than protecting an adult’s image or even livelihood. 

False accusations of rape and abuse are incredibly INCREDIBLY low. There is a much higher rate of victims keeping quiet and not reporting their abusers at all, a dynamic that abusers have used to their advantage for decades.

Amanda recently put up a great blog post about where you can find information about SafeSport and how it works. If you are confused or concerned, I would recommend you start there.

This post is not to convince anyone to think the way I should. As I posted above, that objective is probably futile. (And if it’s not, I am not nearly a good enough writer to change anyone’s strong-held beliefs.)

Instead, the purpose of this post is for anyone who has ever been abused. Anyone whose shame and fear has ever kept them from reporting their abuser.

Your story is valid. You are worthy of protection. And many of us are here to support you. 

For the first time in my blogging career, I am going to actively moderate the comments. This post will not be a platform for anything other than the support of victims. This is my corner of the internet, and it will be utilized to support those who have been abused and those who continue to be abused.

Support Resources:

RAIN Sexual Support Chat & Hotline. 24/7. Confidential – 1-800-656-4673
Report a Concern to SafeSport

This Post Has 0 Comments

  1. mskate2553

    I am so proud of you ?

    1. Emily

      <3 In a very fitting way, it turns out that your like on this blog post was the 1,000th like my blog has received.

  2. Laura

    YES!

  3. Yes to this! It’s so important to speak up in support of victims especially now as we all watch the chorus of people defending the perpetrators. 100% I stand with the victims.

    1. Emily

      Thank you! It is so incredibly hard to speak your truth. It is 100Xs harder to speak your truth against someone that, probably up until recently, you thought was untouchable.

  4. Well said, and I agree with you. I will never understand how people can blindly side with the abuser.

    1. Emily

      Thank you! It makes even me feel better to see posts/comments from those that support the victims. It’s just too important to ignore.

      1. Same! I just finished reading a lot of the support comments for it and I almost cannot believe it – especially what some of them are implying. (I say almost because I’ve seen way too much victim shaming) It upsets me so much. People can’t see their double standard – I mean, if a child was brutally murdered and police finally found the person responsible 30+ years later would you stand with the murderer?! No! Would you say “I know that this person killed the child because evidence, but you know what? This person is so successful and it’s been 30 years. We shouldn’t worry about what they did back then.” That would NOT fly. So why does it fly for this?
        I think it would actually be very cool and helpful if Safe Sport did their own Forensic Files show or something. Show the process, what goes into the decision making. I, for one, would be really interested in seeing something like that.

        1. Emily

          Yeah. The biggest issue is people don’t want to be educated. It’s easier to just not want the boat rocked. And you know what? The boat needs to be rocked and some people need to be thrown overboard.

          1. the_everything_pony

            This needs to be a meme and circulated because you are so right!

  5. Stacie Seidman

    Here, Here!
    While I think Safesport has it’s flaws, the purpose is admirable. It’s never okay to abuse someone. Not now, and now forty years ago.

    1. Emily

      It’s not a perfect system, but it is some SERIOUS progress.

      1. L. Williams

        I definitely concur but I believe we can make SafeSport even better with input from people who really want this system to work – not people who are trying to protect their images. How to weed those people out I’m not sure but the system to safely report abuse and have something actually done about it will help us clean up our sport.

        1. Emily

          Yeah. I mean, I think the emphasis needs to be on protected and empowering victims…. not protecting predators (or avoiding inconveniencing adults)

    1. Emily

      100% feel this. The support on the other side of this argument has been tough to see, but I love seeing people come out to support the victims, USEF and SS.

  6. Meredith

    I stand alongside you in support of victims, or shall we call them survivors. It may be a long time ago for the perpetrator but equally as long for the victims to deal with the crime against them.

    1. Emily

      Thank you. It is a very long time with a lot of shame and hopeless attached to the waiting.

  7. HunkyHanoverian

    i love you and agree 100%. Victim shaming is NEVER the answer!

    1. Emily

      Glad to hear you agree! <3

  8. Cindy

    Thank you for saying this, and thank you for including a link to RAINN. They’re one of my monthly donation charities because they do such wonderful wonderful work and it….honestly makes me feel safer to see people supporting victims and RAINN’s mission. ?

    1. Emily

      Yes! They are a WONDERFUL organization. Actually, they are the link that SafeSport provides on its website as a resource to victims. <3

  9. Karen Taylor

    100% agree with you here. You really can’t change opinions esp over the internet. I’ve fallen into a couple of traps trying to argue but it’s futile. when will i learn lol

    1. Emily

      Yeah, it’s amazing how people simply cannot listen to reason on the internet… However, I do not think it is futile to continue to voice support. Survivors/victims need to see more on the internet that validates them, not vilifies.

  10. T

    Thank you for this. Agree 100% with you and the opening quote sums it up perfectly.

    1. Emily

      The more support we can muster for this effort, the safer and better off our entire community will be.

  11. eventerinprogress

    I stand with the you, Amanda and the victims.

    All the support coming from down under!

    1. Emily

      Glad to hear it! Half a world away and with double the sense of some people 😉

      1. eventerinprogress

        Sadly I’ve seen plenty of people here say similar things regarding the whole “I stand with George” nonsense, including the editor of the biggest horse magazine in the country ?

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